Restomod 944

[LCG]

Q&A SESSION

Trunk conversion in your near future?

Not on this car Dr. F. Jr.

LS1 fit in a 944?

It does, fitting the other part is the complicated bit.

I saw the elephant.

i smiled when i saw it

I saw the elephant

Liers.

buy hey also why has nobody asked what the fuck you're going to do with this thing?

I guess no one cares.

it looks like 1 word.. at elast that happened to me

I tried it a lot, but the only thing I noticed is that I sounded like an Indian tech support guy while trying.

Spending more money to do something his own way shows how much of a visionary he actually is.

The Picasso of cars.




THE PLAN

Make a car that is good at "everything" yet not excel at anything.

I made a deal with a Unknown Talent that you may know, he doesn't condone shooting babies but he feels totally fine being an alcoholic in front of them.

He will be doing the transfer from my visionary mind to some 2d artwork to use as guide. That, as soon as I can begin explaining myself to him.

Yet I made this very accurate sketch in some terms of what I actually want to do, took me a lot of seconds to make so as facebook artists say, you don't like it because you don't understand me.




I really don't want to say much more about it because I need to take the tape measure out and check a few things before attempting to do Plan A and then having to change to B, then to C.. and then people not reading the thread asking for Plan A when I'm already at Plan M.

But, reality is different. This Build is not about the car itself, this build is a Fabrication Exercise.

I follow MANY builds and see a lot of VERY cool stuff and I think "damn I wish I know how to do that" or "that guy must be his wife's hero".

So this is a build where you will see me:

- Learn to be a self proclaimed photographer
- Learn to be a self proclaimed welder
- Learn to be a self proclaimed mechanic ( already am, but this is higher grade mechanic. )
- Learn to be a self proclaimed electrician
- Learn to be a self proclaimed composite specialist
- Learn to be a self proclaimed car designer

Every time I see a picture on a build thread I think how I would have done it, and this is it, my own attempt at doing things the way I want or like on a more complete under control of everything environment.

I have had many cars, but I only have REALLY tinkered in two of them, both of my Camaros, I always enjoyed the journey more than the end result.

This is it.

[veedubbin]

I welcomed the house of pain with a campfire.

It had to be done.

[Motoman325]

Make a car that is good at "everything" yet not excel at anything.

I made a deal with a Unknown Talent that you may know, he doesn't condone shooting babies but he feels totally fine being an alcoholic in front of them.

He will be doing the transfer from my visionary mind to some 2d artwork to use as guide. That, as soon as I can begin explaining myself to him.

Yet I made this very accurate sketch in some terms of what I actually want to do, took me a lot of seconds to make so as facebook artists say, you don't like it because you don't understand me.




I really don't want to say much more about it because I need to take the tape measure out and check a few things before attempting to do Plan A and then having to change to B, then to C.. and then people not reading the thread asking for Plan A when I'm already at Plan M.

But, reality is different. This Build is not about the car itself, this build is a Fabrication Exercise.

I follow MANY builds and see a lot of VERY cool stuff and I think "damn I wish I know how to do that" or "that guy must be his wife's hero".

So this is a build where you will see me:

- Learn to be a self proclaimed photographer
- Learn to be a self proclaimed welder
- Learn to be a self proclaimed mechanic ( already am, but this is higher grade mechanic. )
- Learn to be a self proclaimed electrician
- Learn to be a self proclaimed composite specialist
- Learn to be a self proclaimed car designer

Every time I see a picture on a build thread I think how I would have done it, and this is it, my own attempt at doing things the way I want or like on a more complete under control of everything environment.

I have had many cars, but I only have REALLY tinkered in two of them, both of my Camaros, I always enjoyed the journey more than the end result.

This is it.

This is the most sense I heard from anyone in a while

This man speaks to the soul

[LCG]

ENGINE OUT

Finally I am taking the engine out.

Of course I went all in without doing any research on how to do it, after staring at it for 5 straight minutes I came back to the computer and looked for some guide.

Porsche guys are very jealous of their information so any bit of useful information you can find on something related to the car is cut in half by dead pictures or lost in hundreds of comments.

So after much looking, I found something useful, it was meant for a manual transmission car but they should be the same on the front of the torque tube right?

Frist, remove the exhaust.

Once again I ate a lot of dirt, this time with plenty of vitamins in form of rotten spider eggs and undercarriage protection paint. I already feel stronger.

When a part does not want to cooperate I just show it who is the boss, then we begin a fight for supremacy.




I usually win, my methods are ancient but I have to make it work with the tools I currently have.

Next, guide suggests lowering the front suspension, in my case that turns to time to remove it.

Apart from having to fight hidden bolts of unnecessary heat shielding, front suspension came out easy, dragged it away from the car and noticed one of the most severe cases of bad bushing timing.




This car must have been gangbanged on a lift and liked it because it just wanted to keep its legs wide open.


Next, Remove bolts from torque tube, easy done.

Next, Pull engine out and win dance.

PULL, PULL, PULL, almost make the car fall of the stands.

Scratch your head and wander around the car for 2 hours with eventual pulls on the engine. Because letting it sit will free it magically.

Return to the guide, I must have missed something.

I did everything right, engine is not coming out. My car must be special edition different from the millions of other people.

No! you stupid egocentric dumb ass, guide for MANUAL cars…

Ohhhh right.

After looking for an AUTOMATIC guide, I find something. I have to remove the starter to gain access to the flexplate bolts that attach to the torque tube.

So, remove the starter. This took me HOURS, because to remove the starter you have to:
- Partially remove the header, which was bolted with witchcraft of Dr. F.
- To gain access to the witchcraft bolts I had to remove the engine mount.
- To remove the engine mount I had to remove the oil filter, which was VERY MUCH welded to the engine.

All that in a space just about a hair wider than my head. I don’t need to tell you how frustrating that was.

Add the fact that my own hands blocked the light I was using to find bolts and when I moved it the light will just straight blind me, beautiful moments.

Well finally I take the starter out.




I forgot to take a picture with something to compare sizes, it was huge, like old car huge and heavy, VERY heavy

I wikied the stock weight of a 924, which is 2381 lbs, half of that is from the starter.

Now, I was expecting the flexplate bolts, guess what, yes you are right, NO bolts at all.

Turns out that the torque tube has a massive window covered by a plastic piece hold by a tiny bolt.

That window will open you to the wonders of the plate that attaches to the flexplate.

I saw that many times, yet the guide did not mention it at all so I didn’t bother to pry those pieces apart.

After sitting looking at the car, I decided to give it a try and put a flat screwdriver on the edge and wack it with a hammer.

Loud pop and the thing was free. I took a moment to lament my stupidity under the car while giggling of pure frustration.

I crawl out, and give a good pull on the engine crane and almost hit the front of the car with the engine.

Now I was about to do the win dance when I noticed something was happening

You know when you are at a red light with a bunch of other cars and your brain turns off into the void, your muscles relax and your leg stops pressing the brake ever so slightly that your car starts creeping.

You take a split second to react if the cars around are actually going backwards because you are braking and you almost soil from the fact that you were about to hit the car in front.

Well that happened.

As soon as I moved the engine out of the torque tube the car started lifting, took me a couple of milisecs to understand it and quickly jumped over it.

I understood why it needed such a heavy starter.

So, here I am, almost hugging the headlight of the car so it won’t prepare to launch itself to the moon.

Ever so gracefully I called my wife in a very calm way. No response. I was alone in this. It was a test.

After a minute of good and bad ideas on what I can do, I just looked at the engine and thought, well you go back in after all.

Pulled the crane with my leg and slammed the engine back like I was going to install it FWD.




You can see Dr. F’s stainless steel headers, yeaaahhhh.

I was genuinely scared for a moment, the car could trip over the rear stands and just fall completely to the ground. Not good for anyone.

After leveling with the engine, I placed a tire under the rear bumper and pulled the engine out.




You can see where it left its anchor points, now image going as high as your head.

Obviously I did a mess.



The yellowish area under the car is where I peed myself when the car launched.

The blackish area is where I thought the engine had 1 liter of oil, still amazes me how little I think before doing something I have done many times.

To be continued…

[Greg|H]

Your thread is too entertaining, that brutal removal of the wiring looms

Staying tuned for more Porsche based madness

[Max399]

Love this thread
Havent had such fun reading something in a long time

[cosmo135]

This thread makes me happy

[theseeker411]

One of the most entertaining threads I've come across.

[Motoman325]

Please write a book.
about anything at all.
name your price

[white out]

Please write a book.
about anything at all.
name your price

This.

[DAMI JDM 96]

buen trabajo

[LCG]

MOTOMAN325’s BOOK

Once upon a time there was a boy (allegedly), his name was Motoman325, his parents thought it was a good idea to name it that way, they did not know better. He was born in Bimmerland, a place of yet unknown happiness to me. One day, he cracked his brain pan, he called the Doctor and the Doctor said, no more monkeys jumping on the bed.

End.


I don’t charge for books as I think they should be for everyone, but you can send me any million dollars by paypal at luis@castlek.com



50/50 WEIGHT RATIO

Now that I had a flying car I was not very confident in getting under it. After meticulous calculations done over the course of 2 minutes I added some weight on the front to keep it resting on the front jack stands.




Gave it a good shake and the rear suspension dropped out all by itself.

No, not really, the thing is held by a lot of bolts come on.

Leaving the drums attached was the best forced idea ever. As I could not remove them they ended up working as wheels to roll the assembly as a whole.




I used the jack to pull it sideways on the car, but once it was out I just lifted it and wheelbarrowed it around.

Did you ever fight someone at school just by rotating your arms in front of you and walking towards your rival? Me neither, but that was exactly what the assembly was doing with the half shafts. It was so amusing that I actually played with it around the garage for a while just smacking the floor all around.

Next, removal of transmission and torque tube.
I kid you not, 2 bolts. Easiest removal of drive line parts EVER on any car.

As they say, dildo it if you are brave enough.




I like this thing, in my mind it has the perfect shape for a floor lamp, might as well do it for the new garage.


In order to keep space in the garage for the other cars I had to break it to smaller pieces. That meant separating the transmission from the torque tube.

This time I thought about it for 2 seconds more than the last time I spilled fluids all over the floor, so I bought some cardboard.

Now, before you see next picture…

I had a plan, it was perfect and no spillage was even going to happen, then…

Germans engineers are meticulous intelligent aliens, they have a policy of “a bolt should thread by hand all the way in and wrench just to tighten it”. That policy works backwards as when you are removing them you just break them free and then you can hand unthread.

Well I am aware of this and still I took my longest ¾” breaker bar to break free the bolts of the trans/tube assembly, and of course it was not needed as on the first pull it was so loose that the bar ended up in my knee.

I was not mad, I was not cursing… I was laughing on pain. I didn’t want to put much attention to it to continue the job and forget the pain but that meant that the plan I had and those extra 2 seconds of thought were instantly erased from my immediate future.




On the rush I didn’t remove the converter bolts and obviously when I pulled apart the trans/tube it came with the converter, it bleed.

That’s when my past told my future past that I had a plan and then everything was lost. Damage was contained as the transmission fluid level was low so only the converter was bleeding. Removed it from the tube as quickly as possible while pretending to be a Doctor on ER trying to save a patient asking the converter not to die.



QUICK TIP

Gloves.

Gloves are for mechanical princesses, which I totally am. Yet the problem with gloves is that we don’t have anything that works for tinkering purposes.

You can put on latex gloves, sweat the hell out of your hands and they cannot protect you from sharp objects.

Mechanic gloves are a joke, why do they make them like you were going to finger sex a blender at full speed?. You can’t thread or unthread with “mechanic” gloves, doesn’t matter what nascar tells you.

But then…

Killing time on youtube watching an AMG employee build an engine I noticed two things.

First: The guy looked like he was from everywhere else but Germany, I didn’t care as my name is not Ronald Tramp but the comments were full of many Ronalds.

Second: He was using knit gloves, they looked comfy and he was assembling an engine with them. So I CSIed the fuck out of the video using 400x zoom to see the brand and googling the 40 possible things the glove had printed.

Found Ansell, they have so many kinds of gloves that I actually spent a week reading about the different kinds and what they are for.

After trying two models I went for the 11-840s.




These things are GREAT, like mind-blowing great, you won’t think twice about putting your hand anywhere ( beware, they are great but they don’t protect against STDS ), they are light, very comfortable, well ventilated and have a layer of cut protection on the palm. The very end piece of my piñata costume. Apart from a Helmet that I still need.

I will never ever work again on a car without this gloves.

No more nasty fingernails, or having to wash your hands with 50grit sandpaper to remove all the rest of oil and your fingerprints while at it.



NEW POWERHOUSE

My telepathic inbox has been flooded with all your love letters, thank you very much, some of you ask what kind of engine is going in.

If you were paying any attention to the amount of times the word Camaro has been posted you already know this thing will be LS3 based.

But whooooooaaaaaaaaayyyyy Kissyfur!? The LS is so played out!

Well it is, but I have the parts for a very nice shortblock already here.

Before KY-Turbo kicked me in the nuts, I already had a rotating assembly for my LS3, won’t even bother you with pictures of that but Pistons.

I custom ordered a set of Diamond pistons, moly coated skirts, anodized tops, H13 pins, all the possible goodies for a street build. If the money guns were a thing back then I would have flied to diamond office and shoot all that money to their front office assistant’s face while screaming yeah baby in my best Austin Powers impression.




Just look at it… So perfect, so unused for 4 years….

If there was a Piston Universe beauty pageant this piston may not win it, but I am sure it would end up in the final. That as long as the owner of Piston Universe doesn’t want to build a wall outside of Diamond Factory.


To be continued…

[lamsv]

That piston is dead nuts sexy.

Plan to use Porsche rear transaxle? Or Corvette?

[LCG]

That piston is dead nuts sexy.

Plan to use Porsche rear transaxle? Or Corvette?

- Plan A is experimental, I will try to fit parts that were not made to mate each other.
- Plan B is to try Plan A again.
- Plan C is to try Plan B again.

- Plan D is try to fit those same parts but not mated together as intended but doing the same thing.

- If all above fails, then it will be corvette transaxle or even no transaxle at all, just a diff and the transmission will live on the front tunnel.

[Criztie]

This thread is so awesome that I actually made an account so I could suscribe to this.
I need to know what happens next. I must know!