Random Thread V2.0

[SebastienPeek]

oh man, taxes fucking suck. make more money, keep less. bullshit.

[SebastienPeek]

cunts that make 25k get to keep that whole 25k

cunts that make 100k get to keep 75k

cunts that make 200k get to keep 140k

cunts that make more than that can go get fucked

[Miroteknik]

25k be a whole lotta oatmeal tho bruh and honestly that be not hittin too much after a while

[Miroteknik]

prol jus gonna pay the MAN with the rest of the wagies and have my croissaunte

[OrangeBlue]

Next blown engine got in today.., that makes 3 with the XE and the Evoque.., not counting the F-Pace I'm currently working on...
Plus the one that was "good enough to drive"... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Unreliable cars are the rich man's luxury.

Buy two, drive one. Wasn't that what someone said about jaguars?

[Miroteknik]

Buy two, drive one. Wasn't that what someone said about jaguars?

if you see a jaguar in someone's driveway, they've got 2 more in the backyard

[Miroteknik]

wish i knew someone with a jaguar so i could quip them every time i saw them

- damn! you made it!
- you got it running again huh?
- well would you look at that!
- go easy on her now
- dont push your luck with the accelerator!
- all in one piece!
- does that sound right to you?
- do you hear that banging or is it just me?
- how many bolts did you lose on your way over?
- yeah but don't your AAA membership expire...
- how's the tow truck driver been these days?

[Miroteknik]

wish i knew someone with a jaguar so i could quip them every time i saw them

- damn! you made it!
- you got it running again huh?
- well would you look at that!
- go easy on her now
- dont push your luck with the accelerator!
- all in one piece!
- does that sound right to you?
- do you hear that banging or is it just me?
- how many bolts did you lose on your way over?
- yeah but don't your AAA membership expire...
- how's the tow truck driver been these days?

funny, these could apply to the rx7...

[Miroteknik]

hey bob, where's your land rover?

havent seen it since i bought it

[Miroteknik]

hey bob, heard you lost the house in the fire. i am so sorry

that isnt the worst part

why is that?

the rover wasnt in the garage when it went down

[Miroteknik]

hey did you hear about bob, the poor bastard?

no, i am so sorry, what happened

he got married and bought a jaguar

oh no

[Miroteknik]

i'm gonna do it folks, im gonna pull the trigger

no bob, dont do it, life is so beautiful, you are so young

boom, just signed the papers on this brand new jaguar

HERE LIES OUR FRIEND AND IDIOT BOB

[Miroteknik]

hey man, you seen bob?

bob? havent heard that name in years.....

what ever happened to the lad?

last i heard, he was changing the plugs in the jaguar...

[Miroteknik]

(meanwhile in wild and wacky 2018)

boys, the bitcoin has been good to me, it is time to enjoy the fruits of my investment

alright bob, what you gonna do? go to Hawaii? pay off the house?

no, i've been eyeballing that supercharged xj at the Jaguar dealer downtown

why yes bob, and while you're at it, tie a large anvil to your ankles and throw yourself in a well

[Miroteknik]

alright guys get this.... russian roulette, but every chamber without a bullet is a jaguar

(everybody grabs 6 bullets)