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  • and the deductive idiot that i am.. i think.. well i'm handsome as that bloke, i got jeans and a jacket, i can easily drive to the coast, cigs are cheap, all i really need, really is that victory

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    • and the thought begins to fester

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      • at work, on the drive home, standing in the aisle at the market, its that burgundy victory that keeps spinning around in my mind

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        • i ignore my common sense, all the years of experience, my knowledge of reality... because i want to believe...

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          • i'm gonna buy that victory... and she'll finally come along

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            • how could she not? how dare she not? i will have the bike from the magazine! the very bike! she'll have no choice

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              • you fool

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                • all you did was got yourself a $13,000.00 loan and monthly payment plus interest on an impractical recreational vehicle that you might ride 3 times a summer after the first year you bought it. you still dont have the blonde, and the bikes covered in dust in the shed but you're paying insurance on it and the batterys dead

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                  • even if you got the blonde, you freaking retard, women **** wearing helmets like they **** convertibles, it messes up their hair. if you knew the first thing about these high maintenance hoes, you'd know theyre nothing like the commercial, theyre a pain in the ass, never happy with anything, dont listen to a word you say, and everything you say hurts their feelings or at best, is controversial

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                    • i can count all the times ive given girls rides on bikes on one hand

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                      • it does make a good first-date though

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                        • thats the thing. the best part of dating are the first few dates.

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                          • when you're both on your best behavior and the beast hasnt reared its head

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                            • i wasn't gonna make this about women, i swear

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                              • its just so much of the stuntin we do is at least in some way connected to competing for women

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